Feeling Hopelessly Gutted

My posts are almost always positive and mainly about my road trips. I intend to keep it that way.

But today I’m feeling hopelessly gutted and it’s a broken-hearted feeling that I can’t seem to shake. It’s lots of things really, but this main dagger to my heart is the horrific airplane and helicopter crash over the pretty Potomac.

Sometimes feelings need to be written out to help with the processing. Maybe you can relate and maybe reading this will help with your anguish, too.

At 57 years old, I have lived through a good number of tragedies, but this one hits different.

Perhaps it’s because I can’t wrap my brain around why training military choppers are allowed to fly anywhere close to the final descent path of commercial jetliners. Feels like this could have been prevented.

Perhaps it’s because I fly into this same airport frequently. The Washington DC area is my birthplace and most of my family on my mother’s side live in the vicinity. I’m slated to return for my mom’s 80th birthday and then for my grandmother’s 100th birthday this spring. Will I choose one of the other two airports? Probably not. But I will ponder for a moment when booking.

Flying over the Potomac, quickly snapping photos of the stunning National Monument is one of my favorite pastimes. So much so, that I recently took my daughter on a Potomac cruise to show her that perspective since we fly over that area so much. My camera worked overtime as I shot as many photos as I could of planes landing overhead. I looked forward to my next landing over that stretch of river.

I snapped this picture on our Potomac boat cruise. Today it strikes me to see a helicopter in the shot. Don’t think I noticed it then and probably wouldn’t have noticed it now if I wasn’t writing this piece.

Had I known military helicopters use that prized piece of sky landing strip to train…hmm…I would have thought twice. I have a reason for that train of thought.

Because I was working in the newsroom at KTVK 3TV on July 27, 2007, the day our chopper and the ABC15 helicopter collided mid-air. It was horrific, to say the least. That was the experience that taught me that chopper pilots in that air space relied on visual navigation and not the help of air traffic controllers. I didn’t realize that this could also somewhat prove true around one of our nation’s most congested airports. Perhaps I was naive, but this fact shocks me. I understand that the Washington DC air traffic controllers communicated with the Blackhawk, but I also take note that the chopper crew requested “visual separation”…again why oh why are helicopters allowed to be in that particular air space…a jet’s final descent path!!

As a frequent air traveler, as a mom, as an American citizen…I want answers and I want that changed permanently.

Ok, rant over.

Back to my hopelessly gutted heart that aches. I think this has me feeling so down for many reasons.

Perhaps I can’t shake this because of the passenger profiles, who one social media comment described as a group of travelers “who were all living their best lives” and I agree. That perfectly describes the extraordinary group of people on board on what should have been an ordinary flight.

Perhaps it’s the figure skaters that grab my heart so hard. My daughter competed in figure skating for a few years before she left the ice for the stage. Talk about cohesive. The figure skating community is wound tightly together cheering each other on with the extreme discipline it takes to take on this sport.

Perhaps it’s the traveling families on board with their hard working skaters. Or the married coach couple. We flew many miles with our son’s hockey teams to compete, even to Canada one year. It’s too close to home for this mama heart of mine.

Perhaps it’s the 28-year-old co-pilot cutting his teeth on this particular airplane, soon to advance to both bigger planes, growing his career. One of my son’s best friends (was a groomsman in my boy’s wedding) is the same age, flying the same type of aircraft for a commercial airline. What a thrill it’s been to watch him go from a school-aged hockey teammate to a successful young pilot. Again, this hits close to home.

Perhaps it’s the passenger who was celebrating her 33rd birthday aboard the doomed jet. This should have been a beginning, not an abrupt tragic ending.

Perhaps it’s my years working with beloved flight crews when I was a marketing manager with Southwest Airlines. I was actually trained to participate on a team that managed the media in the event of an “incident” in Phoenix until our headquarter spokesperson arrived. I thanked God every day that I never had to put that dreaded hat on. And I know that didn’t happen because air travel is still so incredibly safe.

Videos of the male flight attendant on board the American Airlines jet is flooding social media because he sang and held passengers’ babies on board.

And his daughter is getting married in a few weeks. I knew a lot of flight attendants like that during my airline years.

Again gutted.

There are many more impactful stories about the late passengers and crew members aboard both aircraft.

So, I feel hopelessly gutted by this tragedy.

But I will still board jets to celebrate my mom’s 80th and my grandma’s 100th birthdays and to continue reporting on my beloved Road Trip with Rach series.

BUT I want to beg and plead with the powers that be…AND I DON’T GIVE A DAMN IF THEY ARE A REPUB OR A DEM…PLEASE DO BETTER!  This tragedy should not have happened.

I beg and plead because those souls on that plane who were “living their best lives” were flying high.

You can’t soar if you don’t fly.

So if anyone with government influence is reading this, please do better so those that fly can have the chance to soar.