A Grieving Love Message: Make Your Life Spectacular

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Our Freebie Friday will return next week.

Today, instead I share a message to make your life spectacular.  I was reminded of this upon seeing a sweet remembrance video about Robin Williams.  I am reminded of this because I have been absent from my blog because I have been busy tending to my broken heart.

One of my dearest friends passed away unexpectedly.  We had just had lunch.  It was spectacular.  Lots of love and laughs.  Gratitude.  I don’t know why, but during this lunch that we squeezed into our busy schedules, we spoke of gratitude.  At one point, I even took her hands and thanked her for the many times that she had helped me.  The times she celebrated my joys and helped me through my heartbreaks.

I need her now to help me through this heartbreak.

My cherished memory bank lets me replay her infectious, warm and fun laugh and to imagine her friendly hug.  I am mad that those gifts have been taken away way too soon.  I am mad that her brokenhearted family is left behind way too soon.

She defined the word spectacular.  From her premature birth, when she fought hard to live…and then walked super early at only 9 months.  She was a spirited, spectacular fighter from the start. In every role, as a wife, mother, daughter, sister, friend….she was spectacular. Always!  She liked to get dolled up and have fun.  She was the life of the party, but in a soft spoken and genuine way. She rooted for others, did for others.  Always.  It has been repeated over and over again that she was someone’s rock.  Truth.

We want our spectacular rock here with us.

This unfair tragedy.  A life taken too soon, who had been very busy caring for those around her who needed support, whether it be support that was emotional or physical.  I want to feel mad and cheated that she left too soon.  Especially for her family. Especially.

For all of those who suffer a painful loss, it is brutal on the heart and on the body.  It is hard to want to celebrate anything during this dark time.  This video reminded me that my dear friend’s life was quite spectacular.  She made it that way with the way she celebrated holidays, made her house a warm and welcoming home to all, celebrated her family and friends.  She took cherished trips with friends and did some cool mother and son cruise adventures.  She lit up the office that she worked in and volunteered at the hockey rink as a full fledged hockey mom ready to rock.  For her sons.  For her friends.  For her family.  Always spectacular.  Always.

I will return to my blogging next week. In the meantime, I pause to nurture my broken heart.  I take some time out to get organized to help my sweet friend’s family in her absence as they begin to adjust to this forced new normal.  What an honor that I can do that for my friend.  My beautiful Becky.

She would have done this for me, for others.  She would have made sure that her efforts were spectacular, but in a quiet, genuine and giving way.  I cherish the opportunity to be of help to her family.

So many emotions.  So many words fill my brain and my heart.  Angry.  Unfair.  Why.

I force myself to change my mindset to thankful.  Gift.  Cherished times.

An absolutely spectacular friendship with a friend who made her life spectacular.  Every day of it.  She embodied that, absolutely truly.

As I said at her services on Wednesday, one doesn’t wish this incredible pain on anyone. It is too much to bear. But we feel this pain so deeply because we loved her so deeply and she loved us back so deeply. Her love was…is…a spectacular one for sure.

A spectacular gift.  So as I found this video today, that I had seen before, I felt as if she was saying through Robin’s words, to make our lives spectacular.

Our Becky sure did.  She is absolutely spectacular.  Love you, my dear, cherished and forever spectacular friend. 





  1. Roxanne says:

    My deepest condolences Rachel, so sad to hear the passing of Becky, I remember meeting her, your dear friend. Thinking of you.

    • ManagedMoms.com says:

      Oh I do remember now that you meet Becky, Roxanne. Thank you so much for your kind words. I am so heartbroken.

  2. Amy Hartman says:

    Thank you, Becky, for living your life in such a bright and extraordinary way that it’s able to touch the hearts of even those who never met you. And thank you, Rachel, for allowing this incredible heartfelt piece into the cyberworld to reach others despite making yourself vulnerable. I won’t soon forget these poignant words or the feeling of lightness and inspiration they’ve left behind.

    • ManagedMoms.com says:

      Beautifully written words, Amy. Thank you so much. Your words touch my broken heart. Thank you